We had one normal shirt made of 100% cotton and then one of 100% polyester. We decided to give them to DC Comics' Scarlet Speedster (The Flash) after he spent the day eating double cheeseburgers. Viola! The 50% cotton 50% polyester Flash Heather Grey Junk Food T-Shirt! Wait...is that how we made it? Yeah sure why not. Seems logical enough and I'm a big fan of Occam's Razor so we'll just run with that. You cool with that? Yeah you're cool. Anyways this Flash Heather Grey Junk Food T-Shirt comes from quality t-shirt manufacturer Junk Food known for their exceptional skill and limited quantity! That's a kind way of saying get this great t-shirt before it is gone for good!

DC Comics Scarlet Speedster AKA the Flash isn't really as fast as they make him out to be. He's actually pretty slow; but he uses a combination of smoke lights psycotropes and Jeremy Irons to make him appear to be the very focal point of the Speed Force. Really he didn't need those first three but just Jeremy Irons there to get the job down. That guy is serious business. I think I may have had too much coffee and too many descriptions involving the Speed Force and the Flash. See? Jeremy Irons solves everything. Any-who this great 50% cotton 50% polyester Flash "I'm Coming!" Heather Red Junkfood T-Shirt comes from quality t-shirt maker Junk Food meaning that this shirt has that awesome vintage style and extremely soft material made famous by those fellas at Junk Food. It also means that this shirt has a limited quantity so get this or Jeremy Irons won't be pleased.

Made from 50% polyester and 50% Cotton this heathered "sandy-brown" t-shirt features an excruciatingly distressed image of the Uncanny X-Men! Yes the t-shirt is purposely made to look like it's been washed at least 575 times. I mean......there's a little color left over. There's some...there's some yellow in there. A little red left over in...uh..Wolverine's mouth. Oh looks like something green may have been washed along with this particular tee. Like...like a gecko maybe. Anyway this t-shirt featuring your favorite X-Men is from famous t-shirt maker Junk Food. This of course means the following apply: "X-tra" soft "X-tremely" limited and genetically "X-quisite!"

Who would have thought that the ladies would be into a superhero known for his command of willpower? That will power probably involves thinking about baseball....and then making a giant hard light construct of a baseball stadium! The ladies do like...flashy things and guys with a bit of confidence. Not too much or else you end up like Sinestro but just enough...like Green Lantern Hal Jordan! That guy gets all the ladies...and leaves most of them Star Sapphires. This great 50% cotton 50% polyester Green Lantern Green Light Junk Food T-Shirt is INSANELY soft and comes from ultra t-shirt maker Junkfood. That means this puppy is high quality and of limited supplies! There can only be like 2400 Green Lanterns at any given time and this shirt will not search out the next closest sentient being of sufficient qualities.

I never quite understood why people wanted Greedo to shoot first. Do all of our heroes need to have Superman morals? The alien bounty hunter came in was going to take Han Solo to his probable death and people get angry because Han took the initiative and killed somebody before he had a chance to kill him. Isn't that the whole idea of a preemptive strike? Maybe we should discuss this factor with politicians I'm sure they'll be able to shed some light on things. This great 100% cotton Star Wars Han Solo Shot 1st Junk Food T-Shirt comes to us all the way from Mos Eisely...okay maybe not but it does come from Junk Food who only makes collectible and extremely rare t-shirts! Get the Star Wars Han Solo Shot 1st Junk Food T-Shirt before Greedo shoots first which causes Han Solo to shoot early but Greedo realizes it and shoots before he even shoots...wait; I think we found a paradox.